I'm tired and weirded out by this whole day.

First it was church this morning. Weird, long story there... and no, it wasn't pretty.

Then tonight, church wasn't so crazy... but it was another "fiery" sermon and then after the message was all over my pastor made a nice announcement about my wedding (and a couple other weddings this year). It messes up my brain when he does that. I can handle a "mean" sermon, and I can handle nice, sweet, sugary announcements... but not back-to-back.

And then I got back home and found out my friend's brother's myspace got hacked by a queer. It was pretty awful, so I called them to say something... my friend's asleep and her dad answered the phone. I don't know what it is, but I find it awkward talking to any of my friends' parents usually.

I need to get some sleep... I wish my brain would just stop thinking tonight before I notice anything else weird.

I don't know if many people saw it, but this morning when I checked OB there was a post from a moderator that really made me feel like making a final post to tell everyone I'm leaving the site. It's not because I had an attitude or whatever, but because I was all of a sudden unwelcome.

How would you feel if an IFB told you that you're only a guest on the site, and you've had a bad attitude (when you've been doing your best to be as sweet as possible while still disagreeing and stating your opinion)? Umm... hello, I go to an IFB church and get along with people there, so why are other IFBs treating me like a heretic? Thankfully the thread is locked and that offending post is deleted. I'm not mentioning names because it was removed, but I just thought I'd point out how ridiculous it was.

I'm thankful for IFBs like Rachel (joyfulpraise93) who have the right attitude. Even though she would disagree with me on some things, we still get along and don't have a problem talking to each other. She doesn't shun me as a heretic or tell others to avoid talking to me. I don't understand why some people can't get along with people outside their little box of IFB-ism. It doesn't make sense.

Please pray that I get it. I applied at H & R Block today. If I get the job, I'll have work till April and then they won't need me (which works out great because I wouldn't have to put in 2 weeks notice...I'd just be done with the seasonal work before I get married). Another great thing is that H&R Block is nationwide, I could get a job there almost anywhere.

If the manager calls me for an interview tomorrow, I really could get this job. It sounds like they are looking for someone to do part-time receptionist work. Once I start, I might be able to get more hours by working at another branch, too.

It's really better than just working retail and getting wacky hours and low pay doing something I don't enjoy. I won't get paid a whole lot if I get this job, but it would be a fun job.

Well, this is the first year I've officially skipped Christmas. Let me tell you, it's probably the most boring day I've had this year. No one around here felt like buying Christmas presents or decorating or doing anything for the holiday. I'm sitting here wishing I could have a job, wishing I could have worked on Christmas day because I don't have anything better to do. Hey, don't people get paid extra for working on a holiday anyway?

Everything's just depressing around here. I miss Vince so much. This distance is gonna kill me.

I fly out to see Vince tomorrow!!!!!!!

I'm probably gonna be the happiest girl in the world when I see him... I just hope the flights go well! I've never been on an airplane before.